My
babies turned 14 yesterday.
My
oldest son is 19.
I
wonder sometimes if I have been the best mother I could have been for them.
I
know I’m guilty of trying to make them perfect little followers. It all started when they were born, really. Clean little
boys with cute clothes and perfect smiles. That might have worked perfectly when they were little.
No
more.
I
love the personalities they’ve developed over the years, in spite of me. Of
course, each of them has different temperaments. They are more or less of many
wonderful characteristics, and to say I’m proud of the men they are becoming doesn’t
even touch the surface of how I feel. I love them so deeply, even more than I
ever thought I would.
They
aren’t perfect young men, but they are progressing.
I’m
reading the book, “No More Perfect Kids,” and the resounding message is just
that. Jill Savage and Dr. Kathy Koch say this about perfection and failure: “However
extremes aren’t where real life takes place. The middle ground of grace is
where we need to plant ourselves and our kids. After all, progress is the goal.
It’s not at all about being perfect but it is about being perfected by the God
who has a plan for our lives.”
Progress.
I
might, or might not (yeah, right!) put this pressure on myself. I mean, I’ve
read “No More Perfect Moms,” too, and it did resonate very loudly with me. I
realize that I am trying to perfect something in my life that is not where I
really want to be. I have been beating my head against the wall to excel and
move forward in something I don’t believe is my calling. I can tell you that it
doesn’t work and tends to strip away hope from your life.
It
can even make you feel like a failure.
I’ve
been telling my oldest son to take a look at his gifts, talents, etc., and
figure out what he wants to do with his life. In encouraging him to do that, I’ve
also explored my own life. I went back to something I gave up on a long time
ago… something that has given me great hope and excitement as I pursue it. We’ll
see what doors are opened, and if they are closed, I’ll have to look at myself
again.
It’s funny how the everyday and mundane can zap the dreams and
creativity that used to be present and exist so deeply in your heart and soul.
What
will happen if you don’t take a chance? You’ll never know if you could have
done it.
“Progress
is the goal.”
Thank
you for the reminder, Jill Savage, and Dr. Kathy.
